part 85: (hanzalah)

**”Bismillahir rahmaanir raheem”
-in the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful-**

Naeema was in a terrible state. She had no idea what to do. she knew that she needed to ask Allah for guidance in this matter but she also knew that it was a grave responsibility.

She had planned out her life so differently. Never in her wildest dreams had she thought of her life like this. Where she would marry her late sisters husband and look after her own niece and nephew as her own.

She imagined starting fresh as a new bride and having kids of her own oneday.

She hadn’t studied anything but never thought it was necessary as part of their culture was that a womans place would always just be in the home behind pots and pans.

But all of this wasn’t her main concern. Naeema had bigger problems right now. She had given her heart and her word to someone else back in pakistan.

It had been her secret uptil now. He was a young, handsome and self driven young man, 2 years her senior.

They hadn’t been dating as such. But maseehullah liked her a lot. He begged her to date him but she refused. She didn’t want to be that loose type of girl so instead she asked him for commitment. She told him that if he was serious then he should do the right thing and come home.

But maseehullah wasn’t ready just yet. He was studying and felt like he needed more to his name before settling down. He wanted to be fully independent Before he started on a new journey of marriage and kids.

But he couldn’t lose Naeema either so he promised that as soon as he graduated in business management and had a stable job, he would come for her.

He was always afraid that naeema would move on and so he made sure he kept track of her every now and then by calling to find out if she was okay and still available for him.

Naeema on the other hand had refused to see anyone else with the hope that maseehullah was coming for her soon.

Finally this year was his last and he had already managed to secure a good job in the U.S where he intended to move permanently after he married naeema.

Every so often, maseehullah would call to inform naeema about his plans and the last time naeema had spoken to him before she came down to south africa, he seemed ready. He said that immediately after his graduation at the end of this year he was going to come home and finally make things official.

Naeema liked him aswel. They seemed to have so much in common… But now this. How was she supposed to make a decision like this?

How was she supposed to marry abdullah while maseehullah waited for her all this time?

Everyone around her seemed so eager and anxious for her answer. Everyone seemed positive and like they knew that her answer would be yes.

How would her family react if she declined? Would they disown her? Would they be angry at her?

But what if she declined and maseehullah didn’t keep to his word?

What if he did keep to his word but wasn’t the perfect husband?

What if she had a terribly life with him?

She immediately had a heart full of regrets. Why had she given her heart over to someone she was not legally connected to? Even though they were not exactly dating but only heartache and complication comes out of giving your heart away to other than Allah.

She sat on her musallah that night after performing 2 rakaats of istikhaarah salaah and poured her heart out to Allah.

She was in such a mess and the only one who could take her out of this was Allah.

How many times do we plan our entire lives ahead. How many times do we fantasize about certain things happening in a certain way?

How many times as teenagers do we dream of marrying a certain individual and in our feeble minds, believe that they are the ones.

But we always fail to realise that Allah is the Greatest of planners. And He alone knows what is truly the best for us.

Once naeema was done, she wiped her face, blew her nose and retreated to bed with puffy eyes and an open heart awaiting Allahs divine guidance…

Only he knows what her future holds…

Authors note:
Maaf for keeping you all waiting for so long.. I have no idea where the time seems to be slipping to lately. To those who were concerned…jx and yes all is ok…
This post is dedicated to f and ****R****
Lots of love and duas…. B.A

Posted by silent living…


6 thoughts on “part 85: (hanzalah)”

  1. Poor Naeema …. Holding on2 a promise – but is it an empty one ???? Cos nothing good comes out of haraam relationships !! And , if he could disobey اللَّهُ n want to date her — what stops him from betraying her or not treating her well !!!!?????!!!!!
    We’ll hav2 wait n see what the outcome of her istikhara is !!!! Hope its not toooooooo long tho’ !!

    جزاك اللهُ خيراً

    Liked by 1 person

  2. اَلْحَمْدُ لِلّهِ you back. Really missed you. May Allah grant you lots of barakah in your time so that you can do all that needs to be done and get full rest إنشاءالله

    Liked by 1 person

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